Ooh ooh...that smell!

Imagine if you will...it is winter and I have to start parking my car in the garage so that it stays warmer and I don't have to scrape snow off if when I want to use it. One winter day I get into my car in the garage and notice a slight funky smell. I roll the windows down and air it out a bit which does the trick. Over the next month the funky smell doesn't go away, so I hang a few Yankee Candle car fresheners off of my rear view mirror. The smell of cinnamon mows down the slight funk. Yeah Yankee Candle! Now winter months turn to spring and the outside temps start to turn from "refrigerator" to "oven" and that slight funk is back. Hummm... After much debate Charles and I figured out that while in the garage for the winter some small critter had taken refuge from the cold in my warm engine. It had crawled up and up, couldn't get out and died. The cold air helped to keep the critter somewhat "preserved" and thus only created a slight funk that was kept at bay with the sweet smells of cinnamon. That was then...this is now. Now I return from my Florida visit. My car has been sitting outside of the garage and the temps are not as kind and preserving anymore. I get into the car to run some errands. OK, the funk is back, the Yankee Candle has dried up, so I spray some Febreeze around. I open the front windows and get the air circulating. All is fine. I get most of my errands done and am headed back home and I decided to "treat myself" to some good old-fashioned air conditioning! I hit the switch, hear a loud "thwack" and a gush of warm air starts to fills the car. Then I hear the unmistakable, smaller "thunk-thunk-thunks" of something caught just inside the vent being moved about by the air flow. And then...then...the smell hits me. The most rancid, eye-watering, putrid, throat-closing, musky, gagging, car-swerving, vomitus smell that has ever swirled through such an enclosed space grabs me and smacks me around!! I am stunned! I quickly turn off the AC and roll down every window, wishing I could find something to smash my windshield out with. I cough, pull my shirt over my nose and mouth and press the accelerator down and find that I CAN drive winding country roads at 60 miles per hour! Oh! And I imagine that with every bump I hit in that pastoral-view lined country road that it will be all it takes to dislodge aforementioned varmint and it will land on my flip-flopped feet as I am driving!

Take a minute here, if you'd like, to picture me on this bright and sunny day, sitting behind the wheel of my cute black Vibe, all four windows down, Lady Gaga coming out of the speakers, driving 60 mph past horses, barns, farmhouses, cows, etc. with my left foot up on the seat, my right big toe only pressed to the accelerator, my t-shirt covering my nose and mouth with my head stuck out of the window as far as I can manage....yes, you are allowed to laugh at me!!

I get home, call (in this order) Stacey to chuckle with, Matthews Automotive to make an appointment to de-mouse my car and Charles to share my tale of woe and ask if he can take me to Matthews for the appointment. The car has sat in the driveway with windows down waiting for today and the appointment with Matthews (God bless good mechanics!) But the real story is this...when Charles and I were leaving to go drop off my car, my wonderful husband, without any prompt headed to my car to drive it so I wouldn't have to. He knew that he was the one to brave that...that smell and not me. That my friends is true love! Not roses or diamonds. Not exotic trips or fancy clothes shopping sprees. It is when he'll get into a stinky car so you don't have to! *sigh*...my hero!


*Blogger's Post Script:
Just picked my car up from Matthews. The mechanic told me that yes there was a mouse in my car. Not only a mouse, but a mouse nest! AND (avert your eyes if you are weak-stomach-ed) that the mouse got chopped up when it went through the fan blades! GA-ROSS! Even the mechanic said it was gruesome!