Classic Target

Today I headed to Big Flats to do some "big city shopping" and Target was on my list of places to visit. To me Target is both a time and a dollar suck. I could spend hours just roaming the aisles of that store and not be unhappy for one moment. Today I was going for three things. Three. Dog treats, toilet paper and to check out the "camping" chairs and possibly get two if they were nice. Here is some of my inner monologue as I walk around.

Oh. Oopsie. I forgot to make a list for what I needed to get today. Toilet paper and dog treats. Not too hard to remember. TP and DTs. Got it. Oh! The Dollar Spot. Lady, if you are gonna have four kids all in the Dollar Spot area, at least tell them they need to keep a path clear for others to get through. No? Well, I'll just wait here for your kids to move. Ooohh! Bandannas. $1? Perfect for decorations for the January crop. How many? 4s' good. I love that hat. I'm not a hat person, I'd look like a total dork. Lemme just try it on to see. Yep. Dork. But those sandals are cute. But my feet aren't. Oh. I LOVE that dress. If I was skinny, that is exactly the kind of stuff I'd be wearing. Too cute. Is this plus sized or maternity? Liz Lange. Maternity. Wonder what happened to the plus size buyer at Target? Did they give the job to monkeys? This stuff is terrible. Honestly. There are three racks here for plus size. OK, those t-shirts are cute. But that is IT. No shorts. No regular jeans. Only super stone washed and low riders. Gross. Just plain 'ole Lee jeans. Where did they go?!! Well, I'll get this pink t-shirt. I should write to someone. Humm... Should I get Charles another pair of shorts? He wont wear those plaid ones. I like 'em, but he wont. Nevermind. Don't look at the shoes. You always complain that they aren't comfortable. Ignore their cuteness. Books! Wasn't there a book on my list? Nope. Toilet paper and dog treats. Oh and those chairs. But I know I've been thinking of getting The Bucolic Plague. Target has to have it. Sam's didn't. Target's got to. Nope. Nope. Not here. Geesh. Oh, but there is the book Suze said she read and was good. I'll get that instead. Better yet-in paperback. I'll start this this weekend. Where are the magazines? Shouldn't they be right here? Oh well. Ipod stuff. I could see if they have that little cube thing. Really? You've never heard of something like that? I'm really not an idiot-I HAVE seen it. In fact I got one from Michael's as an impulse purchase and it worked for all of one hour. OK, maybe it was only $9, but still... I'll try Best Buy. Yep. Yep. There is where the chairs will be. ON SALE! Yeah baby. Rats. Only in pink and blue? I am not into either of those colors, so I'll keep looking. The Eddie Bauer ones are nice and in orange or green, but $23 vs. $9...not today. Is that a "clearance" sign in the garden & patio stuff? Wait? What was I supposed to be looking for? Dog treats and toilet paper? Oh, I'm good. Haven't gotten there yet. Look at that furniture! I am really wanting a love seat sized bench on my front porch in case company comes over and we all want to sit out there. $187? Nah. But those outdoor lights are just too cool. Charles can put them up for me tomorrow. Orange pillows? Do they have two? And they are on clearance? AND they are outdoor pillows? Perfect for the chaise lounge chairs. They are mine! Look at all this picnic stuff they have! Good thing that they are all hot colors this year. I do not need any more-plus I am into enamelware now and vintage stuff. So... But those carafes are cool. They would be good for picnics or if I pick up more catering jobs. Two should be good. Don't need food. Just went food shopping. Will need to pick up something for the 4th. Don't know what I'm making yet, so I'll just hit Tops when I pick up Ginger's medicine. Oh! Yeah right-dog treats! And toilet paper. Here is some toilet paper on special, but it looks yucky. I'll stick to my Northern. Rugs. I do need a new one for the kitchen since Charles dyed the ivory one pink the last time he did some laundry. Pink! Dork! Oh, man! Someone hooted up this aisle. Move along quickly. I love their organizational stuff. I need a new calendar to track my Whim So hours. Last year's was too big. This one looks good. Pink or red or yellow? No green? Nope. Red. Oops. I've passed dog treats. Toilet paper is right over there. But scrapbooking stuff is one aisle over. Check there first and then go back. What happened here too? Did this buyer change? They used to have such cool things. Stacey and I would ooh and aah in this aisle. There is the new MM travel stuff. Kristen said it was cute. I like this. And this. And this. Nah. I like this one better. That's good. There is still stuff at home from the Doodle that hasn't been put away. That album is adorable. Don't have a use, but it's adorable. Not for me, but for someone else. Batteries? Did I get those at Walmart the other day? Oh, yeah. I did. Look. I could get a Starbucks for the ride home. Yeah. Iced not frozen though. $112? $112? Good golly! How is it EVERY time I come into a Target I spend just about $100? Oh well. At least I didn't have a bunch of stuff to get on my list! D'oh! I forgot the dog treats and toilet paper! Oh, well...I'm working at Wally World tomorrow...