The tale of the tag

This post will be a story full of crazy details. Hard to follow sometimes, but all true!

We moved to PA in July. Our car tags were up for renewal in October. I am a procrastinator. I wait until the end of October to go renew the tags for both cars. I call around to find the closest tag place only to find out that PA only has a couple-for the whole state. If you are not lucky enough to live near one, you'll have to go to an "approved" tag agency. BUT each agency will tack on an extra fee for their trouble. The best rate we find is AAA, but you have to be a member to be able to get a tag. Charles becomes a member of AAA. We then find out that we must have a PA drivers licence in order to get a PA car tag. I find the drivers licence office and head over, knowing that our time is quickly running out. Oops. The drivers licence office is only open (get this) two days a week. Wednesday and Saturday. I went on a Thursday. We go back on Saturday to find out that Saturday is only for people who have renewed their licence on line and need a photo id taken. We plan to go next Wednesday. Nope. That is a holiday, they are closed. In double checking that I have all the correct paperwork assembled to get said drivers licence and I discover that my car title is missing. Cannot find it anywhere. So I call the Florida agency to find out what to do. They send me the paperwork to fill out. While waiting for that, another Wednesday rolls around. Charles heads over to the drivers licence office only to be told that the proof of residency we have will not work. The only thing we can get is a signed letter from the Postmaster saying that we receive mail at our address. Charles rushes back to Covington from Wellsboro, a half hour drive, then back again, just before they close and gets his driver's licence. But, alas, it is too late to make it to AAA to get the tag. Now we are well into November, so both of our cars have expired tags. Not too many police in the area, but we are avoiding them like the plague. I have to go back to Florida for work and while down there the paperwork arrives to fill out to get my title reissued. I ask Charles to fill it out, write out a check and send it in for me. He does. He also goes to AAA to get his tag. All is well, by the end of November he is an official PA driver! He passes his car inspection and he is golden! I come home from Florida and wait for my title in the mail. A few weeks later two letters come from the Florida office. One is a check with a letter stating that they do not know what the check is for since it came alone in an envelope. The second is another check and a letter stating that we have a lien on my car and we need the lienholders information. NO! We paid cash for my car, so we own it. I call. Charles had written the VIN number wrong-he wrote a "Z" instead of an "S". Cripes! I have to re-fill out the form and send it back in. Christmas has come and gone. I now have to get my own PA driver's licence, so I wait for a Wednesday to roll around and head over. I get up to the counter and the nice man behind the counter waits while I hunt, and hunt and hunt for my Social Security card. It is not in my wallet! I look for it at home and guess what, no Social Security card. I have to apply for one to be sent to me. I find the SS Administration office and head over. Oops! The people who work the SSA only come in (wait for it...)once a month! Ah, rural living! I wait for the month to come back around again, and head over to the SSA office again. Oh, yes, they do come today, but they only stay until 12pm. Since I had arrived at 1:30, I had missed them. Really?! I am so frustrated by this point and because I am feeling like a total criminal driving around on a very expired tag, I decide to drive to Corning (45 minutes away) to the "big" SSA office and get it there. The man from the driver's licence office said that all I needed to get my licence was the paper that they will print at the SSA office. I go to Corning, request that they print a verification of my request and on the next non-holiday Wednesday I am at the driver's licence office with my stack of paperwork. I give it all to the man behind the counter when he informs me that the paper that the Corning office gave me isn't the right one. Ummmm...what?! Feeling like I have slipped into an episode of the Twilight Zone and have just realized this I can only nod when he suggest that I just wait for my new SS card to come in the mail. Valentine's Day and Groundhog Day come and go. My SS card arrives and I go back to the man at the driver's licence office bright and early the next Wednesday morning. I have all my paperwork and leave with a shiny new, temporary PA driver's licence. But since my car title is a) in Charles' name and b) not in my hot little hands, all I can do is wait for it. I had filled it all out this time myself and mailed it off to Florida. A few weeks after I mailed it I got a call from the Florida agency saying that I forgot to put in proof that I now live in PA. Holy crap! The nice lady says that she'll accept a fax if I can get it over soon. I do and within a week I have my car title! Yeah! I tell Charles that he needs to get back over to AAA to get my tag since it is now MARCH and I cannot avoid the police forever! He gets all my paperwork and heads to AAA last Saturday while I was cropping with new friends. He calls me to tell me that AAA isn't open on Saturday. Am I insane? He says that he'll leave early next week to take care of it. Fine. So, on Monday early evening, I get a call from Charles saying that the AAA office closes in 1/2 hour and that he left the papers he needs on the dining room table. He is headed to AAA and would I please grab what he needs and run it over to him. Wellsboro is a 1/2 of an hour away. I am in "shut in" clothes-flip flops, shorts, t-shirt-sans bra! He says he doesn't care, I can stay in the car. I grab and go! I am flying to Wellsboro and he calls to tell me he is there and wonders where I am! Um, you just called me a few minutes ago. How am I supposed to be there this soon? AND why didn't you give me a little more notice. I am trying not to get angry since I really need this tag and am willing to drive make-up-less and bra-less around town to get it! The story could get really better if I was pulled over looking the way I did with a 5-month expired tag, but it doesn't. It ends with an miffed AAA worker wondering why my husband showed up at 4:55 wanting an auto tag when they close at 5. He got the tag and it is happily screwed onto my car. Not feeling like a criminal, I hoped in the car today and Kiwi and I went for a long drive!