I Hate My Coat!

We have had a nice, warm fall. Not a lot of cool days, hardly any snow. But last night that changed. It snowed and the temperatures dropped overnight. I do not have many winters under my belt, but I have started to dread the arrival of snow and lower temperatures. Not because I am not liking winter itself, but because I HATE MY WINTER COAT!!

Back in 2004 we were planning our Christmas trip to London and Paris and being a true Floridian, I didn't own a proper winter coat. In hindsight I realize that I made two critical errors in my coat purchasing decision:

1) There are no stores in Florida that would stock the kind of coat that I needed, so I was forced to order on-line-which means that I couldn't try it on.
2) My husband's advice was the only advice that I sought out for the specific things that I needed to look for in a proper winter coat. He gave me a list of things that I "needed" in a winter coat. Things that I've never considered like "thermal lined", "sealed seams", "temperature rating" & "storm flap".

Because I always try to look for the positives, I CAN say some nice things about my coat:

1) It is nice and warm.
2) It's black, so it matches everything.

That's it. That is all I have in me to say nice about my blasted coat!!

Let me tell you about this coat and just why I hate it so...

First of all, it is water-proof. Have you ever worn water-proof clothes? They are stiff and make noise. My jacket's material sticks out in all directions, it crumples in odd spots and when I move it rubs on itself, so it makes a scrunchy sound. Yuck.

Second, it's zipper goes up VERY high. I suppose that the collar is high on purpose so that it keeps one's neck warm, but I have a short person's neck and that bloody zipper, that if it went all the way up, it would fall just about a 1/2" shy of my forehead. So, I fold the collar down and zip up to just my neck. This makes the excess collar stick straight up and pokes my cheeks. Honestly! It pokes my cheeks! Nice...

Third, it has elastic sleeves, an elastic waist and lots of "thermal" protection (padding). These three things combined, on this plus-sized gal, makes me look like the Michelin Man out and about, wearing a water-proof, black coat. I've destroyed every photo of me in that coat.

Fourth, it is a jacket and not really a coat, so it can NEVER go from throwing snowballs in the yard to a casual dinner out. In other words-It's UGLY!!!

Fifth, it was expensive. This is why I have not parted with it yet. Yet...

I am happy to say that this weekend I am going coat shopping! I am headed to Burlington Coat Factory in Horseheads and am gonna come home with a proper winter coat that I don't give the squink eye to whenever I take it from the closet. And if it happens to not be water-proof (AKA-snow proof) then I'm gonna put a rain poncho in my car and if I ever need to be 100% waterproof, then I'll slip it on over my beautiful new coat and jump into a impromptu snowball fight!

AND...some unsuspecting, plus-sized gal is going to be shopping the racks of the Goodwill in the near future and see a black, water-proof, Land's End coat on the rack and say, "Oooh! This is a nice coat! Wonder why someone got rid of it?" To her I say, "Good Luck and I hope that the zipper-in-the-cheek thing doesn't drive you too crazy!"